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Posts Tagged ‘impermanence’

I love this blog I posted back in 2011 – Impermanence and living the moment : still working on that !

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©2016 Suzanne Belair Clivia- the Strenght of Africa Oil on canvas 12 X 12 in

Enviroart by Suzanne Bélair, IAF, AFC

I feel very Zen this morning maybe because I got to sleep last night…Life is different when you sleep.

Wonderful day yesterday, had fun with friends at Wildcards exhibit where I put 2 small works and playing with photo album on the net

Creative juices are flowing with new projects taking hold in my mind.

Energy is flowing through me and I am fully aware of the impermanence of everything which makes every second more precious.

I am a vessel through which energy passes from one person to another, from one object to another, from one event to another. Life is an energy dance in which I am a willing participant.

Awareness of the present moment and of the impermanence of all is of vital importance to bring appreciation of everyone and everything around us.

Today I am letting my spirit fully inhabit my body. I will let it stretch…

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I know we are already 8 days into the New Year and I still feel like I have much to do to set my new year into motion.

Organizing the New Year for me is a big task and one that I love to do but one that I am agonizing over. Decisions decisions…

I am reading yet another book, this one’s title being a bit scary “The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield. So far I am not finished but I feel the book is pushing me into action already.

How do I want to organize my time in 2016 and still cope with all my obligations and pleasures? Included in pleasures are family and friends without who I cannot live and remain sane!

The War of Art is talking about resistance and procrastination and is a bit judgemental even if true for certain areas.

My main thing right now is how to find more time to paint. And everything is a choice isn’t it? So how do I fit creativity, thinking space, painting, writing, and everything else life throws at you.

One step I took over a year ago is book to get a new studio set-up, a place to reflect, a place to paint, a place to teach, a place away from my everyday life, a place to work.

It will be ready on or around March 1st and I can’t wait. I can’t wait to go there, have no phone, no internet, no distraction and paint, reflect, and paint again. Bounce ideas, brainstorm and create.

I hope I will be able to go there and forget everything else.

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These are a few pictures of how it is at right now. There will be a kitchen with basic amenities to survive a full day of creating and painting and sharing because I intend to open this place to anyone interested in painting with me and creating together. It will be an “us” space for certain days of the week only tough.

The natural light is great and I’ll have a lot of track lights installed for when it is a little gloomy or dark outside. It will be facing a garden.

I can’t wait to move my entire studio in there. This is my dream coming true!  I feel very blessed !

Within the next 2 months, I should be able to work without distractions, teach and organise small shows.

Organizing the New Year or a new life? Life is ever changing and we must adjust. Impermanence is always part of the equation so lets be flexible. Organizing a New Year could change the course of your life. It’s all about making decisions and dealing with what is being thrown at us with some sort of plan.

Best 🙂

http://www.suzannebelair.com

En français: enviroartfr.wordpress.com

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Lately I have been extremely busy with numerous projects, exhibits, paintings, new photography classes, social events. I don’t mean to use this as an excuse for not keeping up with my blog, but this is life !

 

All of this suddenly came to a screeching halt last week in my friend’s driveway. A silly fall when one foot slipped forward while the other knee absorbed the full shock of my weight, fracturing my knee cap in 2 pieces. Impermanence ! One second, you are fine, a second later, you are lying unable to move in someone’s driveway. Luckily, the paintings I was holding, one in each hand were saved! My first ride in an ambulance, I felt like I was on Chicago fire but was surprised at the confined space in the back. Excellent service and treatment from the ambulance personnel and first respondents that got there 10-15 minutes ahead of the ambulance.

 

Luckily for me, the emergency of the hospital where I was brought in was not that busy and they took care of me immediately. I saw a doctor within one hour of my getting there and was operated by the orthopedic surgeon on duty two hours later that same evening. They don’t keep you in the hospital long now when everything is going well, I was out and back home less than 24 hours later with extra pins and metal wire inside my body.

 

Since then, I am looking at life going by. The first few days were filled with calls from friends, visits from family and scheduled nurses’ visits to change the bandage, physiotherapy and getting used to doing nothing in between. Dependence is the worst thing while lack of mobility is a good second. The first week, while I got used to a walker and a cane to go up and down the stairs, I still needed someone to put my feet up, bring my tea, cook for me and the like.

 

One week later, I feel very strong in the morning and it seems like I can take on the world until I stand up a little too long. That energy fizzles by 2-3 pm.

 

The most surprising thing about all this is that after the first few days, my head became kind of empty, even quiet. This is a very strange feeling for me to have nothing to plan, to execute, to think about. Once I had cancelled the various appointments and commitments over the next month because I need to keep my leg up as much as possible and must keep a leg brace when I am standing and all night to prevent my knee from folding more than what is allowed for the next 6 weeks, I found myself just thinking about nothing. Is this even possible?

 

The biological process of healing is very interesting and quite intricate. I can feel the energy being focused on the area that needs to renew itself. Various systems are at play and I am wondering if this has anything to do with the empty feeling that fills me, as if the rest of my body respects the process and quiets, is demanding less energy so that it can be focused at the site of the injury. It might be a question of medication also I suppose, the painkillers are quite strong even if the pain is not controlled.

 

For the first time, the lack of body motion leads to a lack of focus I am completely unused to. While I was in the hospital, thinking about the next six weeks, I imagined myself writing a lot, working on various websites, painting, all activities you can do without too much moving, but this lack of focus prevents me from being “productive”, leaving me looking into space and unable to do anything but read a bit here and there and talk on the phone with friends and family. A strange state for me. To my dismay, I find the days go by somewhat quickly and find myself tired even if my body is not active. Despite these long stretches of idle time, I still feel a little anxious over the lack of time because of this lack of focus. I should be drawing, researching …

 

The healing process takes a lot of energy. Up until yesterday, I found myself having a hard time completing a thought or sentence. Ah ! After all these years of trying to calm down and meditate, did I finally find the answer? My daughter suggested I could use this time to improve my meditation technique but I am not yet able to do this either.

 

I am wondering what it would be like to live like this all the time, not immobilised, but with an empty head, a worry-free environment where you live one moment at the time. Living in the moment is an ideal I have been working towards but living in the moment with an empty out of focus head is strange and a little worrisome, like you’re missing a vital element of life.

 

I had planned to start a schedule yesterday but that didn’t work. I will gather my drawing equipment and start a drawing project in my lounge chair over the next few days. When inspiration doesn’t come, you have to go to it by using your tools. Sounds like a plan!

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Perception of what surrounds us without the mental screen, without ego is what I seek. As much as possible, awareness can be attained with our full presence, our pure conscience, without the ego, being to being, experience to experience.

The “thinking” mind  is learned, not instinctive at all. It is made up of training, numbers, data, past impressions which have affected the ego. It is necessary to go more deeply into our being to arrive at a communion with what surrounds us.  Even our own reality is not accessible to the ego or our “thinking” mind which always seeks to label, catalogue, fit everything into some box to some extent in order to be able to appease itself and go on to something else.

Reality of what surrounds us is sometimes perceived for short moments, moments that open the door to a deeper understanding, moments that amaze us.

It is only by respecting the present moment that we can attain this perception, this magical wonder where everything becomes clear and simple. Finally, we think “Here is what I did not understand before, here is what I could not see”

This is what I am looking for and what I am trying to convey when I paint, this communion with the subject, the precious reality that is always impermanent, that we must accept as such.

Impermanence ©2013 Suzanne Bélair Oil on canvass, 12 X 24 in

Impermanence
©2013 Suzanne Bélair
Oil on canvass, 12 X 24 in

In practical everyday life, it is necessary to call on our reasoning mind. But it is as important to be able to disconnect from our “thinking” mind and connect with the deeper consciousness of what we are, and to the present moment. It is sometimes difficult to perceive with our inner being, to observe what is without judgement.

In his book “The power of Now”, Eckhart Tolle suggests a good exercise to arrive to this non-judgemental observation. He recommends we get out of our daily temporal mode as much as possible. If this is difficult, he proposes we observe our habitual tendency to want to run away from the present moment by thinking ahead, about what is coming up. This projection into an imagined future creates either hope if that imagined future is better than the present or anxiety if we imagine the future worse than the present.

In both cases, it is but an illusion and these thoughts influence how we live our reality, our present moment. He also suggests that this presence as observer of ourselves, of our thoughts, our emotions and our reactions to situations, will get us to see how our “thinking” mind brings us either into the future or into the past in a repetitive fashion.

Without making it a problem, it is useful to look at our thoughts, feel the emotion and watch our reaction to get to a point where we feel the calm presence that is inside all of us.

http://www.suzannebelair.com

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